Church of nude protest

THE DOUKHOBORS, OR “spirit wrestlers,” were a semi-mystical Christian sect founded in the late 18^th century in Russia. (They later emigrated to Canada.) According to “Man, Myth & Magic: the Illustrated Encyclopedia of Mythology, Religion and the Unknown,” one of the Doukhobors’ favorite means of political protest against military conscription was “stripping off their clothes” at political meetings.

At least I didn't nickname them "Adolf" and "Eva"

These were my sister's kittens.

I'll never go back to Georgia

IT JUST OCCURRED to me that despite the recent passage of the ten-year anniversary, I have never shared the story in writing. That is, the story of my adventures in the City of Dublin, County of Laurens, State of Georgia, on the way home to Chicago from a religious convocation, no less. Including: being jailed, having to scare up bail, fearing I'd never get my car back, wondering how I'd get home, being served pancakes at Denny's by a convicted manslaughterer, praying like the dickens, setting up a temporary operations center in a Motel Six, making dozens of phone calls via calling card, getting my lawyer sister to intervene, hiking several miles to the pound in hopes of getting the vehicle (with scant time left for plan B -- catching a Greyhound bus), hitching a ride on a farmer's tractor, securing return of my vehicle (and thanking God), feeling like the Dukes of Hazzard hightailing it out of the county, getting unmistakable winks from up above just to let me know Who had my back, desperately borrowing gas money from my Atlanta cousin, losing precious gas money somewhere around Nashville, running out of gas in southern IL, and having to beg at eating establishments until a kindly trucker supplied me with enough to get home because I reminded him of his little brother.

Fun three days.

BTW, I'm being tongue-in-cheek about never going back. Everybody I met -- including police, jail staff, the manslaughterer, and indeed most of my fellow detainees -- were in fact very kind to me. I just really like this song.

Bambi McMillion will make you rich

I RECENTLY SAW "Prophetess" Bambi McMillion's evango-mercial for the first time on local cable TV and was--well, the only word for it is astonished.

My first thought: McMillion?  Is that real? Or is she trying to one-up Creflo Dollar in having a gospel-of-wealth-worthy name?

My second thought: Bambi?  That's not right, unless you are a deer, or an adult  entertainer.

My third thought was to search this woman and find out about her background. Turns out it's -- surprise! -- kinda trashy.

But she's entertaining. Check out Bambi McMillion, the Speak'n' Spell remix, done by the brilliant -- and prosperously named -- Steven Buck.



Not Found (Bambi McMillion Extended Remix) from (steven) Buck on Vimeo.

What I don't get about NYC

IS WHY THE OTHER four cities cities under its grip (Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens & Staten) consent to being satellites/colonies of Manhattan. After rolling through Manhattan and then Brooklyn last month (got some good street art pics, but sorry no USB cable for my phone right now, so can't upload) I searched  the term “Brooklyn Hipster” just for fun, and dialed up this Myspace with its presumably tongue-in-cheek nod to “Brooklyn Secession Movement.” (Which, when you look it up, apparently is just the name of an edgy art space -- not an actualy movement.)

But why not? Think about it, Brooklyn. Manhattan needs you more than you need it.

News from Tennabama

THE LOCAL SHOPPER I picked up somewhere near the Tennessee-Alabama border covers towns or "places" including:

Bible Hill, Black Cat, Bobo, Cash Point, Coffee Pot, Coldwater, Delrose AND Dellrose (typo maybe??), Gobblers Knob, Goodsprings, Hollands Gin, Lick Skillet, Locks Crossroads, Minor Hill, Pisgah, Toney, and U-Take-It. 

News from the region: 

• Chad Farmer engaged to Misty Sorrow. Farmer is self-employed at Farmer Construction. Sorrow is employed by Hunstville Hospital Emergency Room.

• Entries now being accepted for the Ardmore (TN) annual Rodeo Queen and Cowboy Contest. Also don't miss the Ardmore Tractor/Truck Pull.

• Addison Claire Tiemann, daughter of Kendall and Holly Tiemann, turned two years old on May 30. She is the granddaughter of Wayne and Sherry Browning and Chuck and Terri Tiemann. Addison celebrated with a Bumble Bee Party (sic) and (sic) her Meme (sic) and Papa's house. 

• Obituaries: Barbara Ann Martin (nee Caudle).

Did Barbara Ann Caudle have a sister named Molly Caudle? 

Ad:

Ain't Charlie 

Nifty?

On June 26th,

She was Fifty! 

Happy Birthday,

You Old Doll!

The laughing woman in the photo appears to be dressed up like a man and wearning a fake mustache.

Celebronicity

SO THE OTHER NIGHT I was watching "The Soup" with Joel McHale, who kinda reminded me of Craig Kilborn. So I sez "hey where the HELL is Craiggers, anyway? Is he ever coming back to TV?" So I hop on the Nets and find that, lo and behold, he is coming back, with a new show on Fox -- in less than one week. Sweet!

"The Daily Show" was way better in the Kilborn days. I've heard people say he was "smug" and "smarmy," but they don't get that it's a shtick, a joke. He's playing a character. Unlike Jon Stewart, whose smugness is deadly serious (and totally unfunny IMO). His audience are the type who think they're the smartest people in the room. Ehh...

And I find that other Craig, the Scottish dude, about as funny as a steaming bowl of haggis. You do know what haggis is, right? I have never managed to get through a full episode of that guy. Kilborn should've stayed. 

AND THEN TODAY, when I get on line, something -- I dunno what -- says: I wonder what’s up with my girl Samantha James? 

So I go to SammyJ's Myspace. Whaddya know! Her new album just came out. 

 Today!

 Now if only I can just put these psychic skills to more lucrative use. 

SOME FOLKS HAVE A PROBLEM, apparently, with the fact that young white hipsters are such a large portion of retro soul act Sharon Jones and the Dap-Kings' audience. 

My reply to the Chicago Reader piece went like this: 

White people, it is OKAY to be white and like black musicians. It really is! It is even okay to be young and white and like older black musicians. Whether enjoyed as a "hipster" or not, by age 30 none of that will matter yet they will likely have a lasting respect for the music, and that's all that matters.

I'm sure SJATDK appreciate people of all ages and ethnicities who buy their records and come to their shows, as long as they're paying customers.

By the way, I am a black dude who grew up in the late '70s and '80s and I hated Motown music. It was my parents’ music. The records sounded ancient and tinny, and they weren’t even in stereo.

But I was a huge fan of Hall & Oates. I started building a Hall & Oates record collection in high school. Little did I know I was listening to two white guys channeling doo-wop and Philly and Motown through New Wave. So now, I can appreciate Motown music. (I never really disliked Philly, I guess because the style was still in during my formative years and I heard it often: see Spinners, O’Jays, Frankie Valli in Theme from Grease…)

In similar fashion, I got into the British group Swing Out Sister, who do jazzy loungy pop. They in turn got me into -- or reintroduced me to -- SOS influences such as Fifth Dimension, Laura Nyro, Astrud Gilberto, Ennio Morricone, Burt Bacharach, etc. *

And how many soul or funk or jazz records would people have never heard if it wasn't for hip-hop samples?

People like Sharon & the Daps deserve to get this kind of love, finally. If they can't get it from black kids because they're too busy listening to Young Money or Trey Songz or whatever, let them get it from white kids.

 

 

* Ed. note 2/5/11: Add to that illustrious list the great John Barry, who died just this week.  

still peeved at this r & b

IN AN OLDER POST I shared why I was peeved with contemporary rhythm and snooze. In that post I blamed Sean P. "Puffy Pops/Diddly Squat" Combs for helping kill off hip hop. I have now received confirmation of this fact, from no less an authority than Pu$$ycow.

Slop culture update

IF YOU HAVEN'T HEARD, there's this fascinating new nature show called "Jersey Shore." It's quite educational.

I have watched several episodes so far. Fascinating! Watch the little round one right there. See it constantly displaying its hindparts? That must be a female in heat, looking for a mate. And look, there's a male showing off its mating colors, puffing up its chest, and utilizing "product" to make its fur stand on end in a bid to attract and penetrate more females. Wow! There go two of them, fighting for supremacy!

The best thing about these critters is, they look just like people and they're really quite clever. They even have rudimentary speech skills.

TOO BAD LADY GAGA's actual songs are as boring as her video concepts, costumery, choreogaphy and set design are creative. But wait -- that describes 95% of major-label music.

New Flash: J.D. Salinger Has Died

Again?